The intentional community idea assumes that when you say love your neighbor as yourself, you have some kind of right to pick your neighbor. I think the ideal of loving your neighbor has to take on the possibility that he may be somebody you're going to have great difficulty loving or liking or even tolerating.I think both are true. In the intentional community in which I live you do have the ability to 'pick your neighbor' but this in no way means that you'll love them all the time. I think one of the reasons that our group has continued for over 42 years is that we've recognized this, and our basic decision making process -'the one no vote"- is about treating people as if you loved them, even if (when) there are moments when you don't.